Knight Owl's Review of X-Men: Days of Future Past; Timey Wimey Stuff

I didn't hate it. So there's that.

I'm not going to spend a lot of time on my opinions on past X-films, because I've done so ad nauseam. Long story short, I'm not a fan. The exception comes in X-Men: First Class, the only film that didn't accompany Singer's directorial stamp. First Class seemed to be the only movie in the franchise that had any fun, any charm to it, not to mention the only film that shows the characters as they should be shown: as comic book characters. Costumes, personalities, style. First Class did what The Avengers did for the other big Marvel team, only First Class did it all in one movie. Even Kevin Bacon was likeable in this movie.

When Bryan Singer (whom I've already taken the time to tear apart) reclaimed control over the franchise I spent the following year, give-or-take, groaning about it because I knew that the magic that was First Class would be taken away. I was, for the most part, absolutely right about that. That charm that First Class had was noticeably absent. It was no longer a comic book movie, it was an X-Men movie. It sounds weird, but there is definitely a difference, in the same way that Tim Burton's Batman movies are not comic book movies. They are fine as movies, but are nearly unrecognizable when compared to their source materials.

It didn't help when Singer immediately brought back all of the original cast to the film, many of whom I felt were miscast. I HATE Halle Berry as Storm. You'd think an Oscar winner could throw some personality into a character, but then again, she's also 'Catwoman'. And that's just an example. The lack of depth affects pretty much every character in the films that doesn't have adamantium bones or isn't 100 fucking years old (sorry, Patrick and Ian. You're both awesome).

No context given. None needed.

This was, of course, balanced by two things. First is Hugh Jackman reprising his role as Wolverine, 'cuz no matter how hard I hate on this franchise there's no way I'm throwing shade at him. This guy IS Wolverine, has been for 14 years now. It was nice to see First Class survive without him, but also awesome to see him back in a good-to-great movie. The second saving grace was the return of the bigger stars of First Class: James McAvoy's Xavier, Fassy's Magneto, Nicholas Hoult's Beast, and Dat Jennifer Lawrence. The chemistry within this cast is undeniable, and definitely helps carry over whatever context First Class contributes to this film. Without this cast, I would probably be mid-rant about how fucking awful this movie is (even though it's not even that bad).

In regards to the plot: ugh, time travel. It's never good. It's only good in Doctor Who because of how batshit insane that show is. It's ok though. Why? Because it's canon, that's why. Same justification I have for Superman killing Zod in Man Of Steel: it happened in the comics, was in fact a major event in the story, and was mostly well interpreted into film given the additional context of the franchise. It made enough sense for anyone with the typical suspension of disbelief for any comic book movie to get behind. It also serves, as X-Men always has, as a decent allegory for social prejudice against a minority. In this film it's more of a representation of the ethnic conflicts taking place around the time that the events of DOFP is set. There has always been a comparison between Xavier and Magneto with Martin Luther King and Malcolm X, respectively, and it is never more apparent than in this film. However, the subject matter of the film does not leave a lot of room for levity. This film was not a feel-good movie. Say what you will about Amazing Spider Man 2, but it was fun. So was First Class. The only notable scene with any joy in it featured the criminally underused Quicksilver character and it came close to going over the top, almost seeming like it was overcompensating for the grim nature of the rest of the film. In the words of Marty McFly, this film is heavy.

For as dark a film as this is at times, it's hard to tell who the villain is. There are a lot of contenders here, without getting too spoilery. First, the most apparent villain is Magneto, but between his desire to protect his kind and Fassy's undeniable charisma it's hard to hate on him. Then there's Mystique, but then again, Dat Jennifer Lawrence. The character has pretty similar motivations to Magneto, on top of being all of the adorable. I feel as though Tyrion Lannister's turn as Bolivar Trask was the intentional villain of the story, but even he's driven by factors that are very understandable if not sympathetic. Again taking away from being a comic book movie, there is no true good and evil here, just shades of gray. It made me miss the shit eating grin of Kevin Bacon and January Jones' incredible bitchface. Those are people one could hate. 

Another criticism I have for DOFP in contrast to First Class is the style it was presented in. By that, I mean that when you watch First Class, it is obvious that the film is set in the 60's. Everything from the appearance, to the music, the set pieces, even the gadgets right down to Cerebro itself is clearly out of the era. In this movie, not so much. Yeah, there's 70's music and clothes and stuff, but there are glaring irregularities, the most obvious of which are the sentinels themselves. Forget that the average computer in the 70's was neither powerful nor small, nothing on this earth circa 1970 looked like a fucking Macbook. 

The highest person in 1970 couldn't come up with this.

Here, we have 20 foot tall purple robots that might as well have the Droid logo inscribed on its fucking face. Not to mention MP3 player-looking pieces of movie science bullshit that Tyrion's just pimping around with. This is technology that we don't have NOW. If you're going to have this kind of sci-fi gimmickry going on in an era 40 years ago, at least make it look the part. Let remotes have big ass antennae. Have the Sentinels look less like in iPad mini and more retro, like a first generation Megatron. At the very least, throw in some shag carpeting or a pimping plaid suit, Don Draper style.

There are two things here that really bugged me about this film, and while both are admittedly nitpicky, that's how I do. The first is pretty simple: as we know, time travel is kind of the lynch pin of the plot. The problem is there is no explanation as to how that time travel happens. Just some random character who shall remain nameless but is already an established part of canon inextricably develops the ability to send people through time. That is maybe the most conveniently random plot hammer in the franchise. The X-Men franchise. It's an accomplishment. The second is the most offending evidence of Bryan Singer's devil-may-care attitude towards the franchise's continuity. So throughout the film, there are little but relevant references to the events of X-Men: The Last Stand. For those who don't remember, Jean Grey goes nucking futs, kills an approximate fuck ton of X-Men, including Cyclops and Xavier, followed by getting herself shanked by Logan. So given the fact that X-Men 3 is accepted canon in DOFP, I have a question. HOW THE FUCK IS PROFESSOR X ALIVE IN THE FUTURE? I'm open to suggestions. Anyone?

Please, keep in mind. This is a movie I liked.

It's on me to accept the fact that First Class is a moment in time, a high point in a franchise I'm never going to whole-heartedly love. And that's OK, because in that context, DOFP is the best movie in the franchise that isn't First Class (so I guess it's Second Class! Jokes!). I'm on board from here on out, especially if the First Class alumni keep making appearances. If that Fassy-starring Magneto movie gets greenlit, I'll buy my ticket tomorrow. In other exciting news, Channing 'My Fave' Tatum is officially Gambit. This could be really fucking good, or just as fucking bad. As long as he's more 21 Jump Street and less Dear John we should be fine. Do I like Bryan Singer's involvement? Nope, but if he ends up being a multiple rapist, karma dictates that at the very least he gets to stop making millions of dollars off of a guaranteed money making film franchise. All in all, this film is a success, especially if you're not prone to hating the X-films like I do. I definitely think it's worth seeing. It has enough nods to the source material for the comic book faithful and plays well enough for the general population.

But if what I hear is true about the next film, they best not fuck it up. I mean it. 

Knight Owl

Knight Owl's Review of Godzilla (2014); Hiding In Plain Sight

It took 60 years, but we finally have a decent film featuring the King of Monsters.

I say that because since his introduction, Godzilla has never been in an all-around good film. Yeah, I said it. The Godzilla movies of yore and yesteryear were fun, there's no argument here. But for the most part they are enjoyed ironically, the same way we enjoy the 1966 Batman show, 1980's-era pro wrestling, and the Toronto Maple Leafs. We laugh at the big rubber suits and the out-of-sync voice dubs because we're SO clever, but no traditional Godzilla film is on anyone's Top 100 lists. And then we have the 1998 'reboot', featuring the all-star cast of Simpsons voice actors, Leon The Professional, and Ferris fucking Bueller. 

My face during this entire fucking movie. 

Honestly, I think this piece of shit was made only to appease Roland Emmerich's wanton for the destruction of famous architecture (see also: Independence Day, 2012, The Day After Tomorrow, White House Down; Christ, he even blows pyramids up in StarGate). My point is that no legitimate film starring the Big Guy has yet to be made. Until now.

Godzilla '14 is pretty much everything I wanted out of the film in that it's not what everyone else wanted out of the film. Stay with me. It would have been easy to make a cheesy, monster action-heavy slobberknocker that is every other Godzilla movie but with better visuals. Most other film makers might have gone the way of Transformers or Pacific Rim; high impact, fast moving, IN YO FACE BOOAHAHAHAH~ and that would have been fine, but not great. Instead, Gareth Edwards decided to take nods from maybe the greatest monster movie of all time: Jaws. This film is a great mix of a slow burn suspenseful sci-fi film with a healthy dose of traditional monster mash and heavy-handed disaster flick. It's something I definitely got behind, but can understand how it might turn audiences off if they are expecting something less subtle.

The plot, believe it or not, is simple: a giant monster or two pop into public view and proceed to fuck shit up, and people react accordingly. Trying to spoilers vague, I'll say that Godzilla needs to defend his title as King of Monsters in the film, and thank God(zilla) for that, because how boring could this movie be if all that happened was 'big lizard tromps and stomps around (insert big city here)'. It's almost as if that movie's been made before! Sarcasm, everyone! Again, it's a long build to a big payoff, but the build is well executed and the punch line is worth the wait. Again, think of Jaws: you get decent glimpses of the main attraction throughout the first ¾'s of the film but nothing substantial, and then the climax hits and HERE COMES THE PAIN. If there's a criticism to be made regarding the overall feel of the film, it's that the monsters are inexplicably sneaky. In no way should a 100-foot tall creature be able to get the jump on any number of people, but it happens on more than one occasion in this film. It is hilarious. Which is good, because the film is lacking highly in comic relief. I mean, it fits the gravitas of the film, and after the 1998 farce I'd want to keep this film as serious as possible just to be as different from Bueller-zilla as I could. But pretty much every laugh I got out of this film was not intentional.

The major criticism I have for this film is with the characters. Not the actors per se, as they were for the most part spot on. But if you've seen any disaster movie, you've met the people this film focuses on. The hyper-intelligent but batshit insane scientist with a vendetta. The young hero, usually with a military background. Young hero's love interest. The elder, wise eccentric that has answers that make absolutely no sense whatsoever for him to have. The skeptical authority figure that's got no time for the advice of said eccentric. Any of these sound familiar? It's the Independence Day special. Within the first 15 minutes of the movie, I thought that the climax would center around Kick-Ass and Heisenberg giving Godzilla a computer virus. Thankfully that is not the case, and the characters were enjoyable, cliches that they are. Bryan Cranston is Walter White at his craziest here, which I was weary about him until the film's events made his overacting make sense. Ken Wanatabe brings a more subtle gravitas as the aforementioned eccentric with all the answers, and is an effective balance to Cranston's ALL CAPS LOCK performance. 

JESSE WE NEED TO COOK...err, no wait...what's the line?

Aaron Taylor-Kick-Ass-Johnson is very sympathetic in his role as the lead, a former military officer trying to get from point A to his family at point B, and just having the worst possible time with it. Elizabeth Olsen enjoys some exposure as the best possible Olsen sister as Kick-Ass's love interest, but doesn't do much more than that. And if you've seen David Strathairn in one thing, you've seen him in everything. He's effective as the military command in charge of the whole mess, but only because he's always effective. Nothing truly special about the actors or the people they portray in the film, but then again, if you're coming to see Godzilla for character development, then you're gonna have a bad time and you only have yourself to blame.

Is Godzilla my favourite movie of the year? No. Probably won't even come close. But it is definitely the best monster movie to come by in some time, blowing Pacific Rim out of the water in many aspects. It does warm my heart though to see this genre coming back in a big way, and with legitimate efforts. It looks just incredible, and the 'less is more' approach to the monster is definitely a different but welcome approach to what could have been an over-the-top run of the mill monster movie, overexposing the creatures and making the film seem drawn out. This film makes you want more from the get-go and won't pay out until the end. Totally worth the watch, especially on the big screen.

And for the love of God, keep an eye out for 100-foot tall monsters. They can be anywhere. Even RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

Knight Owl

Three Reasons Why Bryan Singer Is The Worst

In case you weren't aware, Bryan Singer is the worst.

Pictured: The Enemy.

Stay with me.

X-Men: Days Of Future Past comes out this week, and I'm less than excited about it. I've made my dislike for the X-films rather plain, so much so that my inaugural blog post was regarding the film franchise. To save you the time reading it, it's largely negative save for X-Men: First Class, the only entry not directed by Singer or featuring a mouthless Deadpool.

Since the announcement that DOFP would be directed by Singer and would be a return to form for the franchise, I've been cringing at every trailer, poster, and mere mention of the film. I don't have high hopes for it, and am especially disappointed considering how much I liked Matthew Vaughn's efforts in First Class. I would have liked to see what he could have done with what this film would have been. I will gladly eat my boot if DOFP ends up being my favourite film of the year (currently Captain America 2, BTW), but the current trailers depict just a whole bunch of sad. Like, Requiem For A Dream kind of sad. Forgive me for not being jacked.

So, back to Singer. There have been a great many little things which put together have developed my hatred for him, but there are now three focal points that I feel everyone, if not every film or comic geek, can get behind, and I feel responsible in sharing these points with you. I try to keep my annoyance with said little things out of it, as they seem extra trivial in this already trivial argument against Singer. Nevertheless, I feel that some shade needs to be thrown in the direction of this so-called A-list director as what might be his biggest commercial success is about to hit theatres. Why? Because fuck Bryan Singer, that's why.

1. Superman Returns. Now sure, the movie was one of the shittier comic book movies ever made, but there are a whole bunch of reasons why the events surrounding this POS reveal Singer's douchebaggery. The year was 2004, and Singer et al were coming off the heels of X2's tremendous success. All involved were already in discussion to move on to what would become X-Men 3: The Last Stand and the contracts were all but signed when Warner Bros came knocking for Singer, offering up Superman. Singer not only took the job immediately and unceremoniously told Fox and Marvel to go screw themselves, he took his entire creative team as well as one of the X-franchise's stars (James Marsden) with him. He left the franchise a mess, only to be cleaned up by Brett Ratner, resulting in what would be a lackluster effort. Superman Returns isn't much better of a film, which basically ended up being a two-hour long, $50 million circle jerk for Richard Donner's original Superman film, as opposed to, you know, an original effort. A recycled plot, stupidly boring, with a ridiculous sub-plot surrounding Supes' illegitimate child, and maybe the worst female lead in any comic book film ever. Including Jennifer Garner's Elektra. If not for a considerable effort by newcomer Brandon Routh and the obscene amount of scenery chewing done by Kevin Fucking Spacey, this movie would be unwatchable. I don't know who made the decision to bring Singer back to X-Men, but the past decade has shown that the franchise is the only thing that Singer has going for him other than The Usual Suspects. No amount of eyepatch-wearing Tom Cruise or CGI Giants have helped Singer's career more than the first two X-films, and if everything plays out for the best, DOFP will bring much needed life into his sad life.  
2. “Fuck Continuity”. The X-Men comic books have always been absolutely terrible with continuity. Character deaths. Time travel. Roster changes. In my opinion, the X-titles are so hard to follow even now that they're borderline parody. But, that's after like 50 years of publication. There's going to be some inconsistencies. I get it, and can accept it. There is no excuse for a handful of films to suffer the same flaw. From X-Men to First Class, the amount of glaring contradictions is so high that I had insisted that First Class wasn't even in the same continuity as the original films, and was a straight up reboot a la Amazing Spider Man. Apparently, I am incorrect in that assumption. So Jennifer Lawrence and Rebecca Romijn are the same person? Because that makes no sense if you look at Mystique's relationship with Professor X. Or Xavier's relationship with Magneto. Or even when he loses his ability to walk. And that's just Xavier. Singer's reintroduction to the franchise and his merging of the original trilogy with First Class has created a contradictory nightmare. His response? He hopes the fans are stupid enough to forget about it. In an interview with SciFiNow, he is quoted in saying that he “really hopes the audience will forget about” the blatant inconsistencies present in the series, while also whole heartedly admiting that they exist. That makes Singer a lazy piece of shit. It would be different if he went out of his way to movie-science the problems away (time travel!), but nope, he's too busy dealing with 'other things' (see point #3) to make any of this make sense. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.
3. So, Singer MIGHT be a rapist. Holy shit. When I first heard about the case being brought against Singer by a young man who claims to have been sexually assaulted by the director, I took it with a huge grain of salt. The timing was definitely suspect, with DOFP coming up and Singer prominent in the film's press and fixing to make a killing off of the movie. If that was all there was to it, it's a pretty weak case. BUT there are a couple little things that make the case somewhat more substantial. First, that Marc Collins-Rector was another person named by the victim, who has already plead guilty in 2004 of luring minors across state lines for sex and is now a registered sex offender. There is a noted relationship between Collins-Rector and Singer, so this could be seen as fishy to say the least. Then, a second accusation came from a new victim, claiming that Singer, amongst others, sexually victimized him when he was 17, around the time Superman Returns was released. Jesus Christ. If that's not enough, we have Bret Easton Ellis. Ellis is a popular author best known for writing American Psycho, and currently hosts his own podcast. On a recent episode of said podcast with True Blood showrunner Alan Ball, they got to talking about Singer's predicament and some knowledge got dropped about the parties where these supposed attacks took place. The following is a quote from Ellis: Out here everyone kind of knows about the parties and uh, the kind of underage boys. In fairness, Ellis also goes on to comment on the suspicious timing of the accusations, with DOFP coming out. Even so, it doesn't sound favourable on Singer, regardless of the truth behind the accusations. Light is being shed on elements of Singer's life that I'm sure he would rather keep in the dark. Part of me truly hopes that this is all a bullshit attempt at a money grab and that Singer isn't guilty of what's being claimed. But if it's true...if Singer is in fact guilty of this kind of sexual deviance, he's a despicable human being on top of being an overrated, mediocre film maker and that is something I simply cannot abide. 

Will I see Days of Future Past? Yeah, probably. I don't feel like I've earned the right to criticize something unless I've given it a shot. That principle is why I've seen Twilight. I don't have high expectations for it, but I'm willing to be surprised. Singer's involvement definitely influences my lack of excitement, the reasons listed being only the most glaring slights committed by the director. My opinions of him will not change if he just so happens to not be a rapist of underage boys, but it wouldn't worsen either. I just wanted to express my feeling going into the film this weekend, and wanted whatever readers I have left to be aware. Constant vigilance and all that.

Bryan Singer. This fucking guy. 

Knight Owl.

Let's Talk About The Justice League Movie...

So, this Justice League movie...

Yeah, I know I've been quiet for, well, months. No good reason, let's not dwell. Mostly, it's been a lack of things to talk (ie. be enraged or excited) about. I haven't seen anything worse than I, Frankenstein this year, and don't really have any intention to, but time will tell. Things like RoboCop happened, and it was the biggest 'don't know if want' film for me since Iron Man 3. But again, not much to talk about there. A fan of the original film didn't love the remake? GET OUTTA TOWN! But I digress, because the blockbusters are again on the way and with that will come my oh-so appreciated opinions of them.

That will come; but, before that, I need to talk about this Justice League movie.

Last year I expressed my opinion of Batfleck being a thing, and his involvement in Batman Vs. Superman or whatever title Man of Steel 2 is going with. That hasn't changed. He's going to be fine. And yeah, that was the biggest bit of casting news that this movie was going to have, but over the past months there have been so many characters cast in it that it's hard to keep track. It's now getting to the point of overkill with major characters for this movie that should really only be focusing on one. And now, Zack Snyder has gone on record to say he's directing a Justice League movie following Man of Steel 2.

My first thought: No shit.

The only surprise here is that Man of Steel 2 isn't a JL movie in it's own right. So far, we have Supes, Bats, Wonder Woman, Cyborg (really?), with rumours abound regarding characters such as Green Lantern and Aquaman. Keep in mind we still have Jesse 'I invented Facebook' Eisenberg coming in as Lex Luthor
the (we can assume) main villain. So, with all these characters being brought in, how fucking long does this movie have to be to do all these characters justice (no pun intended)?

The answer: it doesn't matter, there won't be a movie long enough.

The problem is that we now live in a world where The Avengers has happened and was successful. Of course DC wants to put together their equivalent and put it out into the universe. And apparently, they want to do it as fast as possible. To date, DC has done two of their major characters well in film: Batman and Superman. They tried with Green Lantern and it was a mess in every aspect. This will not change between now and Justice League. In contrast, every single major player in Avengers, including the fucking villain, had appeared if not starred in a film before Avengers was released. Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, and Hulk all had their own films with Black Widow, Hawkeye, Fury et al making cameos throughout. A continuity is established through five films before getting to the payoff. DC's retort to this reads like 'Fuck it, YOLO!' and have now placed half the roster of their superhero team in one movie as an intro.

I think there's a good and a very big bad to be considered here. The big bad here is that anyone not familiar with the source material might be taken aback by the sheer amount of people shoehorned into this movie just to set up another film that's at least a year away from its release. This is especially bad considering that there is only one film in this continuity so far, being Man of Steel. Of course everyone knows Batman at this point, but the films everyone's familiar with don't exist in the same world as MOS, hence the Batfleck. As stated, Green Lantern was a failure at another franchise, whether it was meant as part of this continuity or not.

Therefore, instead of the equivalent of the aforementioned Marvel headliners having their own movies, we have one film. Two hours, three at most. And yeah, Black Widow and Hawkeye never had their own vehicle, but it can be certainly said that they are secondary characters on the roster. We're talking about Wonder Woman, maybe the most iconic superheroine in history, and The Goddamn Batman not getting their own films to set up Justice League, a group in which they are major players. That concept is staggering to me. It would be like Iron Man and Thor not getting their movies pre-Avengers. Cyborg? Whatever, who cares. The Flash should be in JL, but no word on him as of yet. Same with Aquaman, but there is rumour of some people attached to the character for MOS2, including Khal Drogo himself, Jason Momoa. And if Ryan Reynolds shows up in that terribly CGI'd outfit anytime in the future I will go all the way out of my entire damn mind. Long story short, there is no context for any characters other than Superman going into MOS2, and there's no real way of establishing context for the following JL movie while also being a primarily Superman-focused film. There just isn't enough time, even if you're faster than a speeding bullet or whatever.

Here's the good thing, and I pray to R'hllor that it works out: it's different. It's pretty much the antithesis to what Marvel has done with their superheroes. Instead of the long buildup over four or more years, we get a star-studded follow up to Man of Steel, see the beginnings of the interaction between what will be the backbone of the Justice League, and get the payoff as soon as two years later. If this has been the plan from the get-go, it's a good move. Even more so considering the development has been surprise after surprise. However, if the pessimist in me is correct and there are just changes and edits being made to an already existing script, overcomplicating things, this could get messy.

DC needs this to work in order to compete with Marvel in any way other than the comics themselves. DC has been doing a great job with their animated films, some of which are the best depictions of the characters in existence. They also have a line up of decent looking TV shows coming out, such as The Flash, Constantine/Hellblazer, and Gotham (squee!), with Arrow doing well as a darker, less shitty version of Smallville. But Marvel is coming up with some TV business as well. Agents of SHIELD is way better than it has any right to be. And with Netflix doing four shows with Marvel for Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, Iron Fist, and motherfucking Daredevil (!), DC won't have the advantage for long.

I'm a DC fanboy at heart, and would be even if Batman wasn't on their roster. I truly hope that this bold play works for them. I think that the casting so far is inspired, especially with Eisenberg as Luthor (but that's a discussion for another day). If it sucks, I guess we'll always have Avengers.

But please don't suck.

Knight Owl