Now I Have A Machine Gun, Ho Ho Ho: Knight Owl's Top 10 Favourite Christmas Movies!

Christmas is easily my favourite time of year, what with the winter weather and the Christmas, and also my birthday! And when I've had a year like this one, it also means that this shit's almost over and I can move on to the next year. I usually jump right in to the Christmas Spirit Mode, but this year I've been hesitant to be merry and have mostly just been cranky. That's where this list comes in. I've come up with a collection of the movies surrounding this bestest of seasons that have helped me make the transition this year, not to mention movies I watch EVERY year around Christmas. I'm sure many of you have the same or similar tradition, but your list will probably look vastly different. First off, there is no Charlie Brown special, as I don't think I've ever even seen it. Same with It's A Wonderful Life; never seen it, probably never will. There is none of that Claymation Rudolph or Year Without a Santa Claus or whatever because I'm so very sick of them (except for Yukon Cornelius, he's a boss). Also also, no Christmas Story, because every time I see that Ralphie kid's face I wanna punch him in the throat.

Seriously. Right in the throat.

Feel free to add in some of your favourites alongside mine, and if you haven't seen some of the titles I've listed here, I urge you to go try them out as they are truly great holiday features. Most are even pretty decent films in general, give or take a Turbo Man.  Also, there is no real order to the list, just the 10 films I go to regularly or have a special place in my heart due to the nostalgia. Here you go, have a read...

10. In Bruges (2008)

This one almost didn't make the list because it's only very tangentially related to Christmas, but one of my all-time favourite films just the same. I also feel that the film captures the extremes of the range of emotions that one might feel during the holiday season: a good laugh one minute, a sadness the next. This is maybe the most manic-depressive movie I've ever seen, and that only makes the film better. Colin Farrell is amazing, as he is in many comedic roles, and keep an eye out for a blink-and-you'll-miss-it appearance by Matt 'The Doctor' Smith!

9. The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)

While there may be better interpretations of the classic Christmas Carol, this is by far the one I prefer. Maybe because I've watched it at least once a year since it came out over 20 years ago (good lord...), or because Michael Caine is awesome, or because I wish that Gonzo and Rizzo could narrate everything, forever. This film introduced me to one of the great Christmas tales, and seven year old me would not be pleased if I left this off the list.

8. Home Alone (1990)/Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)



It may be a bit of a cop out (and I know some may cry havoc for saying this), but I like these two equally; and if John Candy had not been in the first one, it wouldn't even be on the list. There's no denying that the first one is a classic, but there's something about the second film that I just love. The addition of Tim Curry helps, but I'd be damned if I couldn't sit back and watch Daniel Stern get hit in the head with bricks all gods damn day. Also, kudos to Catherine O'Hara and John Heard for being the worst parents who ever parented. Top notch.

7. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (1989)

OH MAN THIS MOVIE! Still one of the best comedies of all time, and maybe the best example to convince someone to like Chevy Chase (you know, now that he's a complete dickbag and all). It's an effective vessel for the standard message that most Christmas films shove out regarding the 'true meaning of Christmas' (we'll get to that in a bit), but in the funniest way possible. The 1980's truly was the best time for comedy. Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?

6. Elf (2003)

I didn't see this movie for the longest time because I find Will Ferrell so hit or miss. It took me several viewing to appreciate films like Anchorman and Step Brothers, and I do think that some of his movies are literally garbage. But from the first viewing onward, Elf has been one of the best all-around Christmas movies ever. It's legitimately funny despite being truly family friendly: Buddy is a VERY likeable character; it gets the standard Christmas messages across; and, most importantly, anyone on this planet can watch it and be entertained. That was not something I would have expected out of this, and I'm very happy to see how popular it's become. Sometimes, Will Ferrell's a genius.

5. Jingle All The Way (1996)

IT'S TURBO TIME! As Christmassy as this film is, I can watch it every day of the year. Arnold truly had a knack for comedy at times. Another feel-good family comedy that stretches into that it's-so-bad-it's-good category. Throw in class acts like Phil Hartman with Arnie's incapability to speak the English language and it makes for a good time for all. And hey! You can see Jake Lloyd in a film that doesn't involve him helping to destroy a movie franchise!

4. The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)

As much as I love to hate on Tim Burton (and I do) (because I hate him so) I can't take this one away from him. While I know he's not solely responsible and didn't actually direct it, it would be hard to watch this film and not say that it had Burton's name all over it. The fact that it's also 20 years old (GOOD LORD) and still looks as good as it does is a testament to the film, and with the stellar soundtrack and endearing characters, TNBC is an easy Christmas classic. And if you have anything to say against it, bring it up to my sister and ruin her day.

3. How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

So that thing about the meaning of Christmas? VENGEANCE! This movie has no right to be as good and funny as it is. Maybe my favourite Jim Carrey performance (except for maybe the other time he played a green character), it was the first film based on a Dr. Seuss work that I actually enjoyed. Also, you know how Shrek was able to mix in some adult humour into a family film? This movie did it first, and very well. Like Elf, it's way funnier than it should be for every age group, and still tells a classic children's Christmas story effectively.

2. Love Actually (2003)

Not only one of the best Christmas movies, but one of the best romantic comedies of all time. Another movie I could watch any day of the year, this film is so very charming and SO BRITISH. Harry Potter could show up in a TARDIS singing Love Me Do and not be as British as this movie is. And pretty much every awesome UK actor/tress is present. Bill Nighy as an ageing rock star is the funniest. Liam Neeson is awesome as the struggling single dad (because really, when is he not awesome?). King Colin, several Hogwart's alumni, Sheriff Rick before he was Sheriff Rick, Kiera 'no one has given a shit about me since Pirates 3' Knightley. There's something for everyone here. And every once in a while, Bilbo Baggins shows up naked. Good times.

1. Die Hard (1988)

The quintessential Christmas feel-good movie. No questions asked.

So there's mine, feel free to show me yours. I'm off, probably to watch one of these (probably Die Hard...yep, definitely Die Hard). Have a sit and watch your favourite when you can, and have a Merry Christmas, or a Happy Holiday, or whatever is politically correct these days.

Knight Owl

Take Back The Knight; Knight Owl's Top 10 Scariest Movies

It's hard to start something like this back up at all, let alone write an intro to it. The last time I addressed you all was a bad time for me. But so much has happened between now and then that has brought me back to my ever angry yet adorable self. Much of that is due to help from you: my friends and family, and I'll be forever grateful for that help. Now like I said, lots has been going on lately. Mandi and I have traveled the world (re: Mexico)(re: one high priced, secluded resort in Mexico). My mom is in the process of moving to Thessalon, something she always talked about doing and I'm very excited about that. Work is still dicking me around, but at this point that's what we call SOP (Standard Operating Procedure). Breaking Bad went out with a bang, and Dexter went out with being fucking horrible. I've been out of the movie scene lately. Very uncharacteristic of me, I know. But I'm very much back in the game, right on time for Halloween.

Halloween is one of my favourite times of the year because it means two things: I get to dress up in costume, and there's a new emphasis on watching scary movies. I love me some horror, but do tend to fall into the trap of not enjoying such a film because it doesn't effect (scare) me. I find many of the more widely accepted horror films boring, if not nonsensical (see The Ring, The Grudge), and find myself enjoying most horror films ironically. But there are the brave few films that actually do scare me upon first viewing, if not fuck me up forever. Some of these films I've only seen the once and will never watch again just to appreciate their effect. Others I watch every year out of love for it and hatred of myself. Please keep in mind this is not Knight Owl's Favourite Horror films, that list looks entirely different. It has fun movies on it. These are the films that had the audacity to catch me off guard and actually frighten me to a point.

Oooook, let's do this thing...
/deep breath

10. Scream (1996)

It's ridiculous to think, watching it these days, that I once considered Scream to be the scariest film I had ever seen. But even now, watching the opening scene with Drew "I was in Batman Forever" Barrymore makes me flinch. Granted, I was WAY too young when I saw this the first time (you'll hear that again later). Now I appreciate this film in different ways. It's a clever satire of the genre it belongs to, created by one of the legends of that genre in Wes Craven, while still being an effective horror film. Scream introduced me to horror films in many ways, and will always be a go-to slasher flick for me. The trick is to forget about the sequels.

9. Insidious (2010)

This movie has no right to be as creepy or effective as it is, but damn. The uses of sound and subtle visuals make this movie uber-fucking-creepy. It helps that, unlike most of the like-minded horror films lately, this movie is well paced. An original take on the 'haunted house' gimmick led to stuff I wasn't expecting, again lending to its effectiveness. Although this comes close to a film that's only good once, it's still one of my favourite horror films of the last decade and still creeps me out to this day. It would be higher on the list if it didn't seem to fall on its ass in the third act.

8. Paranormal Activity 3 (2011)

I'm almost ashamed to admit it, but I LOVE these movies. Yeah, they're definitely 'one and done' films that you never really need to see again, but they are so fucking fun. This one in particular stands out just because I expected fuck all and got my ass handed to me. The first film was good in a 'Blair Witch' kind of way, but horribly fucking paced. The sequel definitely improved in every way, with the multiple perspectives and increase in characters. By the third, I was like 'how many different ways can they do the same shtick?' Then they added in that goddamn oscillating fan/camera and FUCKED MY SHIT UP. Seriously, watch these movies if only once. In a dark room. I dare you.

7. Dawn of the Dead (2004)

This film gave me an appreciation for zombies that no movie before could. I never considered them a viable threat in Romero's flicks, and by 2004 Evil Dead was more a comedy than a horror film. For me, a zombie movie was just a fun time. The remake of Dawn of the Dead showed that zombies could be that threat I was looking for. People say that 28 Days Later gave us the 'fast zombie', but I feel that this is the better example. The zombies are better looking, more gruesome, and far more dangerous after learning how to pick up the pace. Snyder earned my fandom for life with this, and zombies earned my respect here that I would never give to The Walking Dead. Also, the Richard Cheese cover of 'Down with the Sickness' is so choice.

6. Saw (2004)

It makes me sad that they drove this franchise into the goddamn ground, but I swear by the original. By 2004, horror was getting stagnant. The slasher film boom that started with Scream was dwindling to ridiculousness, and the remake craze was just warming up with Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Dawn of the Dead. Saw offered up something new, which would become known as 'torture porn'. This film revolutionized the genre by being so fucking twisted, and it blew my mind in doing so. The ending is one of the best executed twist endings I've ever seen. The imagery is truly gruesome. The 'games' are terrifying in their conception. Attempting to sympathize with any of these victims is a trying experience but easy at the same time because they don't fit the typical stereotypes that a horror film presents and that's where this film got me. You can feel the terror that each victim feels and understand it because that is exactly how you'd feel in that same fucked up situation. Room full of razor wire? NOPE, I'LL CHILL HERE THANKS.

5. Jeepers Creepers (2001)

Kind of a random choice, right? It never ceases to amaze me how underrated this film is. The concept is both familiar and original. The visuals and setting put a spin on embraced tropes put forth by films like Texas Chainsaw Massacre. A new bad guy is introduced to the genre. This movie is fucking neat, but sometimes I forget it even exists. This film pays homage to a lot of different kinds of horror sub-genre. Add to that a cool looking baddie, great pacing, a healthy dose of gore and ultraviolence, and a final scene that I haven't been able to get out of my head for the past twelve goddamn years. This film is bad ass.

4. Halloween (1978)

It's fitting that the climax of Scream featured this film playing in the background, because Halloween is the OG slasher flick. I'm not sure what makes a big guy in a fucking Shatner mask so creepy, but Michael Myers is easily the big bad when it comes to classic horror villains. Most of the slasher film tropes were introduced here, including the killer being slow as fuck, impossible to kill, and completely without dialogue. This is to date the only horror film of its kind to creep me out even in my old age. Scream is a good time now, but Halloween is serious business.

3. Silence Of The Lambs (1991)

Remember what I said about seeing movies too young? This is the perfect example. The scene of Lecter's escape with him killing the cops has been burned into my head for over 15 years now, and still squigs me out. This is proof that a single performance can drastically effect the viewing of a film. Silence wouldn't be the same without Hopkins' portrayal of Hannibal the Cannibal. It's true that the follow-ups didn't quite live up to this film, but I'm almost OK with it. One Hannibal flick fucking me up is enough.

2. The Shining (1980)

This fucking movie. Re-watching it recently, I realized it kind of falls apart in the beginning, because one look at Jack Nicholson should be enough to conclude that this guy is one bad dream away from going stone cold fucknuts. Seriously though, the collection of visuals in this movie are so haunting that it's the only film I watch where I consider covering my eyes or fast forwarding through scenes. Elevator full of blood? No problem, but splice it in with Danny's screaming face and those goddamn girls keeps me up at night. Easily the best horror film of all time in my eyes.

1. Gravity (2013)

FUCK THIS MOVIE. THE END.

Knight Owl's 5 Reasons Why It's OK That Ben Affleck Is Batman

This couldn't have happened at a better time.

For those unaware, my Jandy ("grandmother", for the layman) passed away earlier this week. While it is hard for someone to lose any family member, this loss has affected me greatly based upon my closeness to her. I love her very much and she will be deeply missed by my family. I have been spending the weeks before her passing and the days after preparing myself for the loss and the effect it will have on me in the time to come. Overall I think I'm OK, but that doesn't mean I don't want something to think about. Then, somehow, as if Jandy sensed I needed to focus on something else for a moment, she sent me this beautiful nugget of information. Ben Affleck is Batman.

Like many controversial decisions surrounding pop culture icons, this revelation has caused a bit of an uproar. The casting of Affleck in Zack Snyder's Batman/Superman follow up to Man Of Steel has its advocates, and a vast opposition. Lord knows, I understand where they're coming from. A Batfan of my caliber should be championing the opposition to the role being played by the star of such fare as Surviving Christmas, Pearl Harbour, Gigli, and Jersey Girl. And let's not even talk about 'Bennifer'.

So here's the twist: I like it.

Without going too far into it before getting to the list of reasons why this is going to work, I will say that Affleck is a controversial, if not inspired, choice for the role that NO ONE saw coming. In this way, it's much like the announcement of the film itself. A bold move that no one could have predicted, with everyone in tow ready to back it up. I shall dropeth the knowledge as to why both the film and Affleck's role therein will work. As I am an advocate of everyone's opinions, I assume that even after this there will remain an opposition and I welcome the arguments.

But I'm going to be right.

1. He's Not Christian Bale.

A couple of points here. First off, yes, I very much appreciated and enjoyed Bale's work in the Dark Knight Trilogy. I hold true to the belief that he's the best live action portrayal of the Caped Crusader (so far). But the rumours surrounding him taking up the role once again for the sake of a ridiculous payday fucking TERRIFIED me.

Keep in mind that this is probably not going to be a one-shot deal if it works. We might very well see a Justice League film or at the very least an Affleck-starring Batman film. Extending Bale's run to that length would only bring out the flaws in his performance that people loving throwing shade at. Do we really need that voice for another three films? The more significant problem with Bale's being Batman again is that it completely fucks the continuity of the DK trilogy. It was wrapped up nicely in the context of what it was and should exist by itself with no relation to a DCU franchise, which is also why casting Joseph Gordon Levitt wouldn't work either. We needed a clean break and now we have one.

Getting back to Affleck, not only do we have a fresh franchise, we have a completely unexpected star donning the cape and cowl. And he is SO different from Bale in many ways. Bale was a great Batman and a decent Bruce Wayne. I'm interested to see what Ben's Batman will be like, but he's going to be a fucking GREAT Bruce. He's much more charismatic on screen than Bale; charming, good looking, and can throw around sleaze like crazy when needed. Some are thrilled to bring up his turn as Daredevil as a reference to how he'll be as Bats, but I'll get to that later. Right now, I'm just happy that I no longer have to stress about my beloved Dark Knight Trilogy getting fucked with.

2. Affleck's A Big Guy.

It seems kind of trivial, but the physical presence of Batman is an important element of his character. His whole shtick is based upon striking fear into his enemies and it's hard to do that if you're not physically intimidating. It's one of the many, MANY reasons why Michael Keaton's turn as Batman has lost its luster for me (because he's a fucking midget). Affleck stands at over 6'3", the tallest actor to portray the Dark Knight to date.

Add to that, he's bulky as well. Films like Daredevil and, more recently, The Town show he's able to be in the shape he needs to be in to take on the job. Yeah, he's 41 years old, but in the last 20 years of making Batman films no one has really been young and been Batman at the same time. Besides, we don't know the context in which Batman will be brought into in the new film. He might be a bit older, with the Batman already an established presence in the world. I'm down with it.

One last thing, and it's kind of dumb, but you don't want him TOO big. There was big talk about Joe 'Alcide' Manganiello taking up the cowl, which by himself wouldn't be a bad choice. But he's almost half a foot taller than Henry Cavill and when fucking Superman has to fly just to make eye contact with you, a wrong message is being sent. Trust me, Affleck's got the right look for the job.

3. Affleck's A Nerd.

Nothing makes me happier than when I hear about an actor taking a job he wants because of appreciation for the original work. Affleck's an established and proud comic book geek, as per his friendship with patron saint of nerds, Kevin Smith. Before staring in Daredevil, Affleck wrote the introduction to Kevin Smith's Daredevil graphic novel 'Guardian Devil', and having read it several times over, I can say that Ben has an affection (Affleck-tion?) for the genre.

That's a game-changer when you compare Affleck with someone like Bale or say, Tim Burton. Making art and practicing your craft is one thing, but doing it with the enthusiasm and motivations of a fanboy are so much more. You know who the character is, and moreover you want to do him justice. Burton gave not a fuck about that and turned Batman into a fucking terrorist (see: the last 20 minutes of Batman '89). Nor will it be a Clooney situation where he's just stroking his own ego. Affleck will care about doing a good job, and I feel like the character is safe in his hands.

4. He's An Accomplished Veteran Actor.

Stay with me, here.

Once upon a time, in the long ago, Ben Affleck was Daredevil. It is one of the least liked superhero films that Marvel has ever put out, and the guiltiest of pleasures for me. I love this film, through and through. But I understand why it gets all of the shit. It's not all Ben's fault, but he's the star so some blame will inevitably fall on him. It doesn't help that the early 2000's saw Affleck dump shit movie after shit movie all over the world. His career was spiraling out of control at this time and I was afraid he would never get his shit together.

That was ten god damn years ago, and he has pulled his shit together.

The past few years has seen Affleck rise up as a star actor and a fucking Oscar-winning director. I mentioned before why he'd be a great Bruce Wayne. Well, we also know he can do action in roles like The Town, and his performances in that and Argo show he has a gravitas that is absolutely necessary to be Batman. Clooney comes off like a fucking oaf because he never took anything seriously as Batman. Affleck has the ability to come off as a normal guy, but also has a grimmer, serious tone and look about him when the situation is appropriate.

As mentioned, Daredevil will be a talking point when discussing Ben as Batman, but the circumstances could not be more different. We have an experienced crew in Snyder and company as opposed to Mark Steven Johnson, who's claim to fame includes directing Ghost Rider and not much else. The Superhero film genre is stupidly popular right now when ten years ago, all we had was X-Men, Spider-Man, and Hulk to base our context on. Most importantly, Affleck is ten years older, and thus more experienced in life and film. He turned a spiralling career and addiction problem into a huge comeback story. You don't do what he's done without talent. The combination of that talent and experience will be huge advantages to his being Batman over a lot of the younger talent that everyone assumed would be taking up the role in the new film. And yeah, he has the added experience of being a superhero in a failed franchise. I don't see that hurting. He knows the character. He has the acting chops and physical presence. He has a personal struggle and dark past full of failures, drug abuse, and actresses named Jennifer to pull from. All he needs is the benefit (Ben-efit?) of the doubt. Give it to him, he deserves it.

5. He NEEDS To Be OK.

Lastly, let's take Ben out of the equation for a minute. This is DC/Warner's last ditch effort of catching up or trumping the Marvel/Disney empire of Superhero films. Man Of Steel was a lackluster performance when compared to The Avengers or even Iron Man 3. The Batman/Superman announcement was the kick in the pants everyone needed to get some momentum going for the next few years, and the casting of Batman was the next most important decision to make. This film will make or break the competition between DC and Marvel and the success will heavily depend on the stars of the film. So knowing that, do you really think they came to this decision lightly?

Henry Cavill is still a new face, and while The Avengers had fresh faces like Hemsworth and Renner, it also had Robert Downey Jr., an accomplished actor whose turn in Iron Man launched the whole Marvel line. When he was cast, no one was sure what to think. He went from '???' to 'Best in the world' overnight. Same thing happened when Heath Ledger was chosen as The Joker. He won a goddam Oscar. Inspired casting has made this genre what it is; and now, we have Affleck as Batman. He can very well be the RDJ of the DC movie line. He's popular, successful, on a ridiculous hot streak, and a success story that people can identify with. Ben's the face people will recognize and want to see. Christ, the announcement happened less than a day ago and literally everyone is talking about it. Love it or hate it, this is a big deal, much bigger than if Alcide or Karl 'Bones' Urban got the gig. This is the momentum that the film needs to be as big as Avengers. Yeah, people were going to see the movie because Batman is awesome but NOW more people will be paying attention because no one knows how this will go, and everyone wants to. The only way to capitalize on it is by having it be the right decision. Sure, I would have been OK with someone else being cast. No, I did not see this coming nor would Ben even be on my list of people to cast. But here he is.

In conclusion, I strongly believe as a movie buff and as a Batman devotee, that this is a good decision. Call me in 2015 and we'll see where we are. If I'm right, you're welcome. If I'm wrong, and Affleck just Clooneys the fuck out of this thing, feel free to berate my tombstone. Because I will be dead of sadness and stress-induced aneurysm.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, thank you Jandy, and I love you.

Knight Owl

The Best And Worst Of July 2013; The Highs, And The Oh-So Lows.

Yeah, so I've fallen a little bit behind on my posts for the simple reason that July sucked for the most part; and going through an entire month of suck can really take the wind out of your sails. But here I stand sit, trying to get it all going again.

I've had to do a lot of growing up in the past few weeks, most of it against my will. If my taste in movies hasn't given it away yet, I can be pretty child-like even now in my late 20's. So things like setting up car insurance, buying a car (the Cardis!), getting my money right, they are all foreign to me. I've had to nut up and get them done. Well, hit the Final Fantasy victory music, 'cuz for now it looks like I got shit taken care of like a motherfucking adult. Now, having said that, I'm gonna bitch about some movies.

Given that I haven't posted in nearly a month, I thought it prudent to not do a handful of full length rants/reviews as that would be exhausting for everyone (mostly me). So I've opted to do several shorter rants on the films I've seen throughout the month of July. Now, much like my life in July, the films released on average were not great. Like, surprisingly so. If there is an optimist somewhere inside of me (there isn't) he would hope that the summer movie season didn't peak in May; but alas, this year it's apparent that we were on a downward slope after Star Trek, with some Man Of Steel-sized goodness along the way. To further simplify things, I've marked every film with a 'Best' or 'Worst', which is pretty self explanatory. I'll drop a little knowledge and hopefully by the end of it, I'll be back on track. Enjoy the downward spiral.

BEST: Despicable Me 2

Sometimes animated movies are the best. You know what you're getting: nothing serious (unless it's a Don Bluth movie, fuck that guy), probably ridiculously silly, some lame jokes, maybe a decent message. Sometimes you get a surprise kick to the feelings, like Up or Toy Story 3. DM2 is a great example of a balance between a good kids flick and something that a quasi-mature movie goer can enjoy. It helped that I find nothing funnier than watching my Mandi be entertained by a silly movie. The magic from the first one isn't gone so much as it's different. There are shades of superior animated films featured, such as The Incredibles. Also, and most importantly, Minions FTW. If you're looking for a good laugh without wanting to suffer through all the dick jokes, give this a shot.

WORST: The Lone Ranger

This should surprise no one, and by now everyone has heard about how hard this has flopped to the point of costing Disney to the sum of over 140 million. Maybe now people will listen to my anti-Johnny Depp rants. Don't get me wrong, Depp can be great, but the guy who played Raoul Duke is long dead and has been replaced by a drunk pirate. And even if this movie wasn't Captain Jacked into oblivion, there was just nothing special about this movie. It was very by-the-numbers, predictable, and about an hour too long. If this movie was made about 13 years ago, or I was 13 years younger, I might be singing a different tune. This was basically The Mask Of Zorro, but with white people. And one of them plays an indian.

THE VERY BEST: Pacific Rim

Ugh, my heart hurts thinking about how poorly this masterpiece of a popcorn movie has done. Everything that I feared would be wrong with this film was fucking PERFECT. Most notably, this movie looks indescribably good. You know how in Transformers, whenever the robots get into a scuffle, everything gets SUPER INTENSE to the point that you can't see or don't know what in the full hell is happening? This does not happen in Pacific Rim. The action scenes (of which there is a perfectly suitable amount) are clear as day, excellently timed and paced, and very engaging. I was more involved in some of the fights between Jaeger and Kaiju then I have been some UFC bouts. The acting was well done, with Jax Teller and BAMF Idris Elba leading the way. The story was great in that it was simple. It didn't try to be anything more than a sci-fi action movie where giant robots fight giant monsters. It shouldn't be hard to make a good film about that, but by the gods we have it in 2013 and Guillermo Del Toro deserves a lot of praise for it. He won't get it, and the film won't make half the money that Grown Ups 2 or whatever will (*cringe*), but the fact that there are people out there capable of putting out work like this gives me hope.

WORST: Red 2

Remember what I said about Despicable Me 2 not losing the magic of its predecessor? Red 2 lost the magic. The magic has Alzheimer's. Everything that made Red one of my favorite films of that year was gone, and all it left was a cliche and a prayer. When Red came out it got a lot of comparisons to The Expendables for some reason, and I find myself doing the same thing here. The first Expendables tried too hard to be great and ended up being so very meh after all of its hype. Red was very under the radar, until it came out and everyone loved it. The Expendables 2 fixed the problems it had and became a decent throwback to the 80's action fare that most of its stars are so known for. The opposite happened to Red 2. The Bruce Willis of yesteryear is gone and he's clearly ready to ride off into that sunset, as it's getting more obvious with every Die Hard entry that he gives less and less of a fuck. Malkovich and Mirren fall flat more often than not, but mostly because what made them great was not knowing or expecting how great they'd be. The word was out by the sequel and everyone knew what to expect. Not even Anthony "What did you see, Clarice?" Hopkins could save this from being a disappointing shadow of its former self. Red 2 should never have happened.

WORST: The Wolverine

Missed it by that much. While this was a VERY significant improvement on the first Wolverine solo venture, I grow more and more convinced that Marvel cannot do a good movie on the darker characters of its universe. Daredevil, Punisher, Wolverine. They all deserve good films, but in order to be good they need that R-rating that they will never get. There were some well done things in this film, don't get me wrong. I might even need a second viewing just to get my feelings straight with this, but the first viewing left a poor taste in my mouth. They're portraying Logan too much like Bruce Wayne, with the brooding and the promising never to hurt anyone ever again. HAHA NOPE . Logan don't get sad, he gets angry. Wolverine is the berserking action hero of the Marvel universe, just let him do that and enjoy my money. Also, and this is more of a personal note, but there are some links to the other X-films in this movie (without specifics, because no spoilers!) that drive me up the fucking wall. I hate hate HATE that X-Men going back to the way of Singer and First Class was just a happy dream of mine. It makes me sad, and so did this movie.

Alright, all caught up I think. Hopefully we get some good movies in before the summer ends and I have to wait till American Thanksgiving or whenever for another string of popular films to verbally destroy. One can hope.

Knight Owl

Knight Owl's Review of World War Z; And the song remains the same.

It's time for the zombie craze to end. Now.

Film has become a very fad-based industry over the last decade or so, playing off of what emerges as the newest big thing. When Lord of the Rings took off, suddenly we saw several comparable epic fantasy films. X-Men hitting it big kickstarted the Comic Book movie genre. Saw started torture porn. The Blair Witch Project made found-footage movies seem like they're a good idea. The Harry Potter franchise revealed the market for Young Adult novels as adaptations. Thanks buddy, 'cuz I really appreciated those Twilight movies (he said sarcastically).

Anyways, zombies have been riding their 15 minutes of fame for almost ten years now. Hit films like Shaun of the Dead, 28 Days Later, and the Dawn of the Dead remake had renovated what may have been considered an outdated sub-genre before their releases. There were subtle and obvious changes to the clichés, such as improved make-up and visuals, better stories, and the introduction of the dreaded 'fast zombie'. It was a remarkable about face for a type of horror I've always appreciated and have grown to love. But there's only so much you can do with zombies, and about 14 of their minutes should be up. World War Z is a definitive example of this.

Disclaimer: I have not yet read the book. This review is based solely on the merits and flaws of the film in and of itself, which as I understand is for the best considering the film and book bare no real resemblance to each other save for the title. Yeah, that sucks, but one time Joker killed Batman's parents and it was still considered one of the best Comic Book adaptations ever for some time. Shit happens, bro. Anyway, I hope to get to the book soon, but for now I just have this, which is not a lot.

Generally, zombie films or TV shows can go one of two ways. Either the work is a character-based plot where the protagonists basically go from point A to point B, aimlessly trying to stay alive, or it is an objective-based story where the humans are out for some sort of Chekov's Gun that either ends or drastically changes the conflict. Both versions are tricky in that one is entirely dependant on the audience identifying and actually caring for the characters enough to be interested in their plight. This is why I loved Zombieland and Shaun of the Dead, and why I HATE The Walking Dead. I could barely give a shit about any one person on that show for a 50 minute episode, and you expect me to watch three goddamn seasons!? NOPE. The second approach is difficult because there is a finite number of inventive ways to pull it off and even when it works, it's purely Movie Science(!) that's usually pretty retarded and is borderline-Star Trek in realism. With World War Z, it doesn't even matter which one of these formulas (formulae?) the film follows, because it would do both poorly.

With as vague of a synopsis as I can give, the basic story follows Tyler-fucking-Durden, a retired CIA investigator or whatever, who is called back into action to go figure out why nearly every human on the planet is taking an affinity to longpig (aka: nomming humans) and/or how to stop or cure them. It kind of plays on both versions of the zombie movie in that there are several side characters you meet along the way, including Durden's family, some military guys, some scientists, etc., and they're all going along with Durden on this little trip. The problem is that no one is on screen long enough (save for Tyler himself, of course) for the audience to give a shit about them. It was kind of like in An American Tail, where the cartoon Communist mouse is running around America trying to find his family and runs into all kinds of people, helping out in various ways bringing the mouseki closer and closer to his objective. The only difference is that the mouse is even slightly endearing. Brad Pitt can be one of the most charming mother fuckers to grace God's green earth, but he might as well have been Keanu-goddamn-Reeves in this movie. Sure, the world's going to hell. You know what all of these uberstressed out bastards could use? A little levity, some chumming around; hell, even the slightest clue that you give a shit about their well being, other than what they're helping you with. Durden was a harsh prick in this film, not unlike almost every single fucking character on Walking Dead. You know who's awesome? Woody Harrelson. Next time, be Woody Harrelson.

The whole 'objective' part of the story also falls flat for a couple of reasons. First off, it's never really clear what anyone's looking for. I get that there's a mystery element to the thing, but it leads to the subject matter jumping around while all of the action is happening elsewhere; and every once in a while I forgot what the hell Durden was supposed to be doing, other than letting everyone around him die so that he can catch the next plane to Vegas to rip off casinos with Clooney or whatever. It was underplayed enough that even after the film was over, I found it lackluster at best. Sometimesd the end justifies the means, and a poor set-up leading to an awesome wrap-up is forgiveable. This is not such a time. I would have preferred a film more devoted to one or the other type of zombie film, or at least a single goal or likeable character. This was a bit of a mess. By the way, that cross-class between Ocean's Eleven and a zombie flick would be best. Write that down.

The saving grace in WWZ is where it and really any big budget zombie film should be: in the action. There are many thrilling epic scale scenes of the hordes running down humans like nothing, and for the most part it looked really well done. Obviously, many of the scenes were CG-heavy with the sheer number of zombies being thrown into the mix. However, it was depended on a little too much I think, leading to a whole Lord of the Rings epic battle feel. And no, that's not a compliment. The other complaint I have is that, when focusing on Pitt and Co., the action scenes were more reminiscent of a Michael Bay film about cars that are also robots. The fights are very fast-paced and extremely close up, making it nearly impossible to determine what's happening. That shit is excruciating, more so in 3D. Save the couple bucks and see it in regular D.

The biggest thing I liked about this movie is such a small thing, but no serious zombie movie fucking does it: characters ACTUALLY USE THE WORD 'ZOMBIE'! It is literally the stupidest thing in the world that this doesn't happen more. It would be like everyone in Gotham City referring to Batman as 'Guy Who Dresses Like Bat'. And it happens all the time. The only time that zombies are referred to as such are in the comedies like Zombieland and Shaun of the Dead. Does no one watch movies or TV? This is why the average people will be wandering around when the real zombie apocalypse comes, wondering what the hell is happening whilst I rack up the shotguns and start breaking off table legs. Pro tip: go for blunt, not sharp. Sharp things get stuck.

All in all, WWZ isn't the film it probably should be. Not every genre film of this kind gets the money behind it that WWZ had, and the publicity it has gotten over the past few months has been ridiculous. The book it's based on is (apparently) really good and has enough of a following that the film was pretty much guaranteed to turn a profit. All that considered, I don't think there's any audience that will thoroughly enjoy WWZ. If you're a fan of the book, too bad 'cuz the film couldn't be more different (again, apparently). If you're a fan of the zombie genre, you've probably seen better efforts made with far less resources. If you're just out for a random movie experience, you will find things not to like, from the unlikeable characters to the unstable story right to the straight up lack of common sense that every character seems to possess. Another pro tip: if they're attracted to noise, STOP SHOOTING.

Then again, maybe everyone should watch it. Watch as many zombie movies as possible, just to be ready. Constant vigilance!

Knight Owl

Knight Owl's Review of Man Of Steel; Coming of age

And I saw it. And it was good.

It's amazing to me that a character with the word 'Super' in his name could muddle around in mediocrity in film and TV for as long as Superman has. The original film in 1978 was revolutionary mainly due to the special effects. It truly made the audience believe a man could fly. Too bad the majority of the rest of the movie was a campy, if not boring outing that has not aged well. Superman II was fun, to be sure, but the fact that there was a noticeable director change midway through the film hurt it. Superman III and IV were both truly terrible films. Superman Returns was a tremendously lazy effort to play into the audience's nostalgia by having it be a sequel to Superman II, despite a 26-year separation. TV didn't fare much better for the boy scout, as Lois & Clark was a campy soap opera, and Smallville was a 10-year long cocktease that didn't deliver (don't get me fucking started on that finale). There have been good moments, sure, but even Superman deserves more than just that. He deserves a good film.

Now, he has one.

Man Of Steel was a perfect storm of a world-without-a-Batman film series; a super hot genre of Comic Book films, a great direction, and a Christopher Nolan with nothing to do. It was a great modern take on a classic hero without falling back on the nostalgia that may exist from works past. It shed a new light on maybe the oldest superhero still relevant in pop culture, and might have kickstarted the revival of the DC universe in film. I almost hate to say it, but MOS is to Superman what Batman Begins was for Batman. It was different from the source material, but in a fresh way. You know, as opposed to a 'why is Parallax a cloud? I hate everything' kind of way.

I honestly don't have much to say about this film except that everyone should go see it. I'm not usually an advocate of the 3D movement, but if possible, go see it in 3D. The visuals are at the spectacular level that I have come to expect from Zack Snyder. It doesn't matter how you feel about his work, they are always stunning to look at. The look of the Kryptonian tech, the scenery, everything looks phenomenal. This is complimented by a near-perfect tone for this post-Dark Knight style of Comic Book film. Superman has never been this dark. It's not Batman by any means, but the optimistic shinyness that Clark typically represents is not prominent here. Instead, it's a kind of mask for the conflicting humanity inside, almost like Kal-El is at odds with Clark and Superman is the result. It's a great way for the audience to relate to a character that might be the hardest to relate to. I call him the boy scout because, up until MOS, that's what he's been: the prototypical, do-no-wrong lawful good perfect guy. That guy is nowhere to be found here, and it's awesome.

When Henry Cavill was cast as Clark, I think I was the only one I knew that 1) knew who he was, and 2) thought it was a good choice. I'm glad to say that I'm totally vindicated here because he was spot-fucking-on as Superman, through and through. I was more hesitant about Amy Adams, who is very hit or miss with me. She was great in films like The Fighter, but I couldn't stand her in Enchanted. I had no idea what to expect but was pleasantly surprised by her performance. I think a lot of credit should also go to the script for making her look like an actually decent journalist and not the damsel in distress that just herp-derps her way into trouble. But of course, since I'm a heel guy, the award goes to Michael Shannon for his turn as General Zod. There was a lot of potential to go nostalgic, as Terence Stamp's 'Kneel Before Zod' line has been immortalized by pop culture. Thankfully we stayed away from that, and Shannon made Zod his own character who was both sinister and sympathetic at the same time. The character reminded me of the type of antagonist that Loki was in Thor and The Avengers, or John Harrison was in Star Trek Into Darkness. Great job all around.

If there was a complaint that I have (and of course, I have one), it's the battles between Superman and Zod or his goons were too Michael Bay-ish in their presentation. It would be naive to say that I wasn't expecting there to be heavy CGI in a Superman film, but a lot of the scenes went a little far with it. Also, the film did that Transformers thing, where it was fast-paced and extremely close up, to the point that at times I had no idea what was happening. It went from that to landscaping scenes of people getting thrown through things. There was no happy medium. Snyder's work has often featured well-produced slow motion fights, and while they might not have well accentuated the superspeed and such that was being used during the fight, the film would have benefited from some slower paced slugfests between Zod and Clark.

That's it. Finally. I'm very happy with this film. It is, without a doubt in my mind, the best Superman adaptation in film. I'm glad to notice the impact that The Dark Knight has had on the genre, especially in the DC side of things, and hopes that any following films will take note in one way or another. I'm hoping that this will motivate the production of DC-based films, as Iron Man did for Marvel. It's also clear that Nolan, while in a producer's capacity as opposed to director's, still has some influence over the tone and style of a film and should be allowed to have it. Snyder was a great pick for director, and I hope he sticks with the franchise.

Welcome to the 21st century, Superman. We've been waiting for you.

Now go re-do Green Lantern, because damn.

Knight Owl

Knight Owl's Top 10 WORST Comic Book Movies!

Like I said, there's great, and then there's really, REALLY bad.

I shared with you all my favourite Comic Book Films in preparation for the release of Man Of Steel, but in sorting through to find what would be that list I came across a lot of the garbage that has been intermingled with the goodness. While I would love to think that Man Of Steel is gonna get a 'best', some of the titles on this list are a humbling reminder that sometimes you just don't get what you want. Again, the only deciding factor for the titles being on this list is my personal preference, and there is no real determining factors outside of that. In many ways, some of these films are better than I claim they are, but my rage cannot be objective. Also like the Top 10 best, some of these might be surprising, but one or two you will see coming. 

Please, Zack Snyder, don't let Man Of Steel join these ranks. 

Oh, hey, speaking of Superman...

Honourable Mention: Superman Returns (2006)

No, this is probably not the worst film made to feature the boy scout, nor does it really belong on the list, but it's the only one on here because I don't wear nostalgia goggles when I watch it. The Christopher Reeve films were a staple of my childhood and while I don't think they're great movies or have aged well, they are close to my heart like the Tim Burton Batman films (which are also not good). I think the biggest thing that irks me about Superman Returns is that it didn't even come close to the hype. It took 20 years to follow up Superman IV: The Voyage Home or whatever and, for all intents and purposes, it was the exact same film as the first Superman. I get making homages to a predecessor, but this was ridiculous. Another land scheme? Really, Lex? Not to mention the fact that, although Routh made a very acceptable Kal El, we had the most emo Superman that could ever emo. Continuing where Superman II left off was a mistake, maybe the biggest one on a long list that this film makes. Thank God for Kevin 'Verbal' Spacey, without him this would be nearly unwatchable.

10. The Punisher (2004)

This movie breaks my god damn heart. It had so much promise, with a convincing lead man in Tom Jane, a modest budget, and a fantastic 80's action movie story. On paper, it was a slam dunk. And then...I don't even. He has all of these guys responsible for killing his entire fucking family, and he's playing them against each other like its the Game of Fucking Thrones! Anyone who has read the source material should agree, there would be no planting of earrings, no blackmail photos, no prop fire hydrants. He would isolate each major player (something he had the opportunity to do several times) and kill them horribly and publicly. This movie let me down like crazy. Watch Punisher: War Zone, a bad movie in its own way, and you'll have a better idea of what this movie should have been.

9. Batman & Robin (1997)

I know what you might be thinking: "Knight Owl, how is this not higher on the list?" Well, my bias for Batman aside, there are worse films out there. This hot mess is so bad that it's enjoyable. Arnold as Mr. Freeze is so laugh-out-loud terrible that he makes this movie one of the funniest of his career. George 'The Coolest Guy in the Room' Clooney's turn as Batman was disastrous, made worse only by him still referencing that he was Batman once in public. This film committed many crimes, the biggest of which might be the use of Bane as Poison Ivy's Hodor. Basically, this was a two-hour long toy commercial, and it nearly killed the franchise. It took a rare visionary like Christopher Nolan to bring the Bat back. Do not let this happen again. 

8. Hulk (2003)

This film accomplished the vexing task of making a two-hour film about a giant rage monster boring as fuck. The Comic Book Film archetype was still being nurtured at this point (with X-Men and Spider Man being the front runners), so there was still some work to be done in figuring out what worked. But holy shit, this movie was about so many things that no one was paying to see. Ang Lee tried to make Hulk more than it was, a cerebral dramatic thriller that just so happened to feature the fucking Hulk as opposed to the Comic Book Movie that so many (me included) were expecting. Sometimes you want an Oscar winning drama, sometimes you want Bruce Banner losing his shit and beating the ever loving fuck out of everything from tanks to Thor to Loki. Gotta pick your battles, I guess. Best performance to Sam Elliott's moustache, though. 

7. X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

Wow, this fucking movie. Could there be any more action movie cliches? My dislike for the X-Men films has been well noted, but this one really takes the taco for so many reasons. I could go on for days about Deadpool, but I won't because there are so many characters in this that were just wrecked. Gambit, Sabretooth, and Deadpool join the long list of characters buried by the X-Men films. Worse than that is the fact that whoever was responsible for this mess googled 'Action Movie Tropes' and threw them all in Wolverine. Jackman is perfect as Logan, don't get me wrong, but there's only so much you can do. At least The Wolverine can't be any worse than this...right?

6. Ghost Rider (2007)

Who thought this was a good idea? Seriously? Nic Cage was at least ten years too old for the role, the film was laced with bad CGI (including Cage's abs!), and the source material wasn't nearly popular enough to pull off a feature film of this scale. If it were me this would have been much darker, more directed to the crowd that made Blade such a huge hit a decade prior. The sequel was much more fun, but in a ridiculous way a la Crank. Next time, would someone find their balls and tell the clearly batshit insane actor that he needs to sit the hell down?

5. Judge Dredd (1995)

If you read my review for Dredd (p.s. no one did), you'd know how I feel about this very 90's flick based on the satirical and ultraviolent 2000 A.D. Not only was this just another Stallone vehicle, it completely missed the fucking point of the comic. This film turned a criticism on the American view on violence in film into the very thing it was criticizing. Dredd (2012) was far superior, but that's not saying much.

4. Spider Man 3 (2007)

Name me a good thing about this movie. I dare you. The only joy I got out of this is the ironic laughter at the Emo-Spider dancing scene and some such ridiculousness. James Franco is THE WORST villain in Comic Book Film history as the Green Ranger Goblin. The shoehorning in of the Gwen Stacy character. The senseless involvement of Sandman in Uncle Ben's murder. The absolutely unforgivable raping of the Venom character/storyline. All this on top of the terrible, horrible acting that had been typical of the Spider Man films under Raimi. This is easily the Batman & Robin of Marvel movies, only worse. Because it's not Batman.

3. Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)

How do the Fantastic Four movies exist in the same universe as The Incredibles and still be so very awful? Pixar basically made a Fantastic Four movie and it was freaking awesome. The only reason the first F4 film isn't on the list is because Chris Evans is charming as fuck in it. In this travesty of a sequel, he basically phoned it in as if he already knew he was gonna be Captain America. Mind you, everyone phoned this shit in. No one could give a fuck about being in this movie. Not to mention setting the precedent for making it OK to turn a powerful antagonist into a fucking cloud. This is legit one of the worst movies I've ever sat through, and the only reason it's not #1 is because I really can't care about the comic book characters that these films are based on. Reed Richards and company can gooooooooooooo fuck themselves.

2. Catwoman (2004)

A movie so bad, I damn near forgot it even existed. It's nice to know that even an Academy Award winning actress can commit career suicide. Take a look at Halle Berry's filmography post-Catwoman. It's a hot mess. I just can't fathom who thought this was a good idea. The Batman franchise had yet to be saved, so there was no momentum on any DC characters to capitalize on. Berry was already involved in the X-Men films, so she was already on the Comic Book bandwagon. The script was horrible, the acting was worse. It was a tremendous waste of time and money, and the unabashed humiliation of a classic comic book character. Taking the cake for me though was Sharon Stone's villain, who was superhumanly tough BECAUSE OF ALL THE MAKE UP SHE HAS WORN! HOLY SHIT!

And the worst Comic Book Film ever...wait for it...

1. Green Lantern (2011)

NOPE.

Knight Owl's Top 10 BEST Comic Book Movies!

Does anyone else think that it's ironic that Superman's run in film has been, well, not super?

This friday, the boy scout gets another shot at the silver screen with Zack Snyder's Man Of Steel, and I find myself very excited for it, despite the fact that I've been hurt before. Superman Returns was mediocre at best, saved mostly by a spot on performance by Kevin Spacey. Looking back though, it was hardly the biggest failure that Kal El has suffered on-screen. I've always found the first Superman film to be boring at times, even though I know how important and groundbreaking it was. Superman II was almost ironically good, but is still the Wrath Of Khan of Superman films. Superman III was a hot mess, and Superman IV was even worse. Smallville was a 10-year cocktease resulting in one of the biggest letdown finales I've ever witnessed (no, I haven't seen Lost yet). I think big blue is due for a win.

This little retrospect got me thinking about the whole Comic Book Film craze that we've been blessed with over the last decade or so. There's lots of good, and a whole fuck ton of bad. I decided to look though it all and dig out what I loved the most. Then I took my love for top 10 lists and Expecto Petronumed this bit of business up in preparation for this weekend. This isn't really rated based on any one thing other than personal preference, so I wouldn't be surprised if some are confused by some of the choices on the list. Some, on the other hand, are pretty damn predictable if you've been paying attention or have ever actually met me. I do hope Man Of Steel makes it on here, but then again, I'm a Batman guy, I'm not all optimism.

HONOURABLE MENTION: Daredevil (2003)

This is probably the worst movie on the list of films I absolutely love. There's so much wrong with it. The casting, the acting, the costumes, the cheesy one-liners. For all intents and purposes it should be a mess of Green Lantern proportions, BUT for some reason I'm endeared to it. Some of it is my love for the character, the closest thing to Batman that Marvel has to offer. I also am a fan of Affleck and Colin Farrell, so that helps. Jennifer Garner is horrible, and this and Elektra were cases in point of that. Michael Clarke Duncan really made it work though, especially since his casting was criticized for having a big black guy play a big white guy. MCD was money here, and I'm sad he's gone and can't be in the remake. This movie, with all its faults, was a gritty but fun homage to the original works during the early stages of Marvel's entering the movie fray. I loves it.

10. Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (2010)

This movie, like the mini series of graphic novels that it is based on, is so much fun. Over the top ridiculousness with a quirky sense of humour and a touch of teen angst behind it. It doesn't hurt that its setting is in Canada, cuz we need some love in films sometimes. The story is fresh, original, and directed right at my age group with nostalgic video game references, indie rock, and the lack of understanding of what a vegan is. George Michael Bluth is uniquely entertaining in this in that he doesn't play the same role he's played in every other thing he's in. This is one of the funniest films I've seen in a while, and one of the most faithful adaptations.

9. Blade (1998)

Remember when vampires had balls? Before vampires were over-romanticized gimmicks for thinly veiled metaphors for sexualism (FUUUUCK YOUUUUU TWILIGHT), they were monsters that only a bad mother fucker could deal with. Blade was the baddest of asses in this way-better-than-it-deserved-to-be film about a minor Marvel character. Also, it's neat to note that Blade was the first huge box office success of Marvel's films, two years before X-Men was released. Blade was a kick-ass action flick, a great showing of vampires as they should be seen, and a solid foreshadow for the line of comic films to follow. If a Punisher or Daredevil remake happens in the near future, someone should take note of how a badass comic book movie is done.

8. Hellboy (2004)/Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008)

"'Can't Smile Without You'...yep, I'm gonna need a beer, too." This one's a tie, simply because I love them equally. For a comic book as under the radar as Hellboy was at the time to have such a great adaptation is remarkable, not to mention having a sequel be just as good. Ron Perlman, a fantastic character actor, breaks out here as the hugely entertaining hero. The script is great at being very dark and light hearted at the same time. These movies establish Guillermo Del Toro as a major player in creature features, with a distinctive look that leaves CGI by the wayside and brings back a more realistic feel to fantasy not seen since the 1980's. Both of these films are awesome and hold up to this day, several viewings later.

7. Kick Ass (2010)

I love this one for a couple of reasons. One, Hit Girl is awesome. Two, I like that it addresses the fact that, in real life, being a superhero would suck. It deglorifies everything that the comics and films tell you about superheroes. They'd get the shit kicked out of them. Three, it's a living example of what The Dark Knight's edgy, dark and twisted view of a superhero film could be. Yeah, it goes to the R-rated extreme on a couple different occasions, but it's also so over-the-top and Tarantino-esque in its violence that it's hard to take seriously. Nicolas Cage's channelling of Adam West as Big Daddy is priceless. I'm looking forward to the sequel coming out later this summer, even if it's half as good. Just don't let the kids watch it.

6. 300 (2006)

Even though it's been meme'd to death, 300 is still one of the better frame-for-frame adaptations of a graphic novel there is. Frank Miller's masterpiece translated into a Gladiator-style film perfectly, to the point that some are flabbergasted by the fact that it was a comic book first. Zack Snyder proved his quality with this ultraviolent quasi-historical period piece starring Gerard Butler and his abs. The film was straightforward, beautiful, and featured some of the best moments in film we've seen in the last decade. "THIS IS SPARTA!" "TONIGHT, WE DINE IN HELL!" "THEN WE WILL FIGHT IN THE SHADE!" Need I continue?

And speaking of Frank Miller...

5. Sin City (2005)

This collaboration of art redefined the Comic Book movie in it's formative stage, as well as the Film Noir. It was innovative in so many ways, from the use of different directors, to the black-and-white presentation, the inspired casting, even the make-up was remarkable. This Pulp Fiction-style action film was an eye opener for many and is a great example of making the original source more mainstream. If Frank Miller was big in comics before this film, he was HUGE afterwards. The ensemble cast was near perfect, and going for an R-rated comic book adaptation when everyone else was shooting for PG was a remarkable move by Miller, Robert Rodriguez and good ol' Quentin Tarantino. Now, if only it didn't take a goddamn decade for the sequel to come out...

4. Iron Man (2008)

Marvel's main man, and for good reason. I've already talked about how Robert Downey Jr. is the perfect Tony Stark, but this movie is more that just him. By 2008, Marvel movies had their 'origin story' movie formula down to a science, to the point where it was becoming weak. It was basically the same movie over and over with interchangeable heroes and villains. With Iron Man, it was the same, only it was the best example of it. Great acting, great visuals, and a perfect translation of story-to-screen. The other Marvel entries were good-to-great, but only because Iron Man was SO good. The Marvel line of films is one of the most successful film franchises ever, and Marvel has Stark to thank for it.

3. Watchmen (2009)

Forgive me, but I actually prefer the film to the novel. You almost never hear that, but this is a case where everything went together so well on screen that it shows some of the weaknesses of the original material. The book is very long winded, very political, and has not aged well. A lot of the political rhetoric is so forced that you could be beaten over the head with it. The fat is trimmed for the film, despite being 3 hours long, while not losing its impact. Watchmen was a perfect combination of casting, direction by Zack Snyder (again), and weirdly enough, the soundtrack. The music in this movie is incredibly used. Contrary to what some think, I believe that this film more than does justice to one of the most important graphic novels in history. Lack of giant alien squid notwithstanding.

2. The Avengers (2012)

What else can I say about this that I didn't say in one of the MANY posts I made about it last year. This movie is a big deal. Whedon is godlike for pulling it off. Kudos to RDJ and company for being a stellar cast for a near impossible movie to make. Every Marvel film between this and Avengers 2 is at a disadvantage for having to be compared to it. Awesome, just awesome. Only one thing though.

It didn't have Batman.

1. The Dark Knight Trilogy (2005-2012)

Surprising no one, I'm sure. I grouped them all together because, unlike most if not all other comic book film series, this is the epic telling of one story. It's not 'this time I'm fighting octopus guy' or whatever, it's the story of the rise and fall of a singular character. Batman Begins brought the iconic character back to life after an abysmal Batman & Robin and made him cool again. The Dark Knight was a revolutionary piece of art that redefined the summer blockbuster and the comic book movie. The Dark Knight Rises did what so few threequels do effectively: it concluded the story in a way that brings all three movies together. It's what the first Star Wars trilogy did. Yeah, there's a bias. I'm a Batman guy. But if that continuity didn't exist, than Avengers would have this spot, or The Dark Knight would stand alone. This isn't just a great series of comic book films, it's great storytelling, which is something the average film franchise has been lacking in for some time now.